Forever begins just becuase i thought about it: if i wasnt too cool to drink

new years 1

then i would be drunk right now...
nothing literally mattered. haha but fuck it..this is my life and im gonna deal with whatevers in it. haha but seriously though..
wasnt that shit funny?
haha asif a blog could watch a video and give me feedback.
fuck friends man. id rather just lay with someone.

so im gonna edit this pic of sev real quick..ill brb..
bitch

Sevvy by ~thafro on deviant ART

i love editing lately...idk haha but i have NO sense of urgency to do it..

so anyways...once again.
ive lost my train of thought..
its only 9-11 pm and i took a nap at ashs...so that just means that its gonna be a LONG night man...
i fucking hate these...i had one last night..
im envious of those out there that have someone.

so this guy kid cudi -http://kidcudi.com/news/-
hes a pretty cool fckn guy..idk his mixtape isnt whack. its what ive been bumpin lately next to q-tip and the aquabats.
hahaha the mthafckn aquabats man..
theyre senseless and i love it...
you know what?
its just occured to me that i have an obsession with senselessness.
i hope that doesnt end up fatal. haha that wouldnt be good, cuz then ill just do senseless shit just because...asif i dont do that now..

so what next?
i didnt go to ces this year..
i woke up today and i just..didnt want to do it alone..
but i didnt really just want to do it with anyone..
people whom know me well, know that im geeky.
i think thet that is an experience i would love to share with someone that isnt as tardy as me. haha
maybe next year.

i could give so much of a shit less how this years going to be.
i lost alot last year.
bigtime just proved that in life: all bets are off!

i miss my mother man..
fuckin....'
i just want to talk to her again..
fuck yanno? she grumbled and mumbled worse than me..and i love that now.
i see her now as my escape? yanno like..her life sucked so bad...but man..she never did say shit like 'damn my life sucks' and i started to look up to that in the end..
it never use to be an example for me to follow. but shish haha 'life' in general is whackly right now man. the most ive got is my livelyhood.
and family. whom i dont take for granted..i could just use more.
oop! there i go again..
i digress...

i cant believe im alone right now.
i would take it as far as calling myself pitiful..
but illl let someone else do that.
til then. im so damned cool.

yanno??

i wish someone ive never met in my life, would interview me..
im interested in the questions that they would ask me, and definitely the answers i would give..
i want to be publicly important.

my life is so content on the outside.
gah! i can just sitback and look at how beautiful things are..
but for all things good...theres gotta be something beneath the surface?