Monday, September 24, 2007

[the] Room of Doom

essay number 1 for the semester...

im not proud of it..but i should def. get a c or better...idk haha

i wish  some ome this ish were more natural..haha anyways


"The Room of Doom" is what I have begun to call my sanctuary. This area that is also my room is that of a publically private domain located in the back of my current residence. This location that I chose to write about doesn't only mean the world to me, but it is my world, and I am the governor, president and sometimes even a dictator of and in my own room. By the end of this essay you should have a little bit of insight on the feel of the room and an understanding of how important a room can be to an individual.

                As I lie here on my love sac, I start to realize that my room has a modern feel to it. At first glance it seems like an active 26 year old could occupy this space. The room seems filled but not entirely used; I have a poster of New York's Time Square positioned above my door that leads to my backyard, I keep it up there for some nature of inspiration. There are six usable corners, four of which are filled with the essentials of my generation. One corner has my bed that is one the most reliable sources of relaxation that the room provides. The corner opposite of that the bed lounges the love sac. I call it "the sac", and that big bag of memory foam holds the power to attract the body of any onlooker; the word "Plop" comes to mind when I listen to people blitz themselves onto it. Opposite of that corner stands my television that I acquired with the room; it provides adequate entertainment when needed, but doesn't play an active role in the importance of my room. The corner that matters most is the corner that is located in the back of the room; where my computer desk is established. I spend 75% of my time in this vicinity of the room typing my life away while listening to whatever music is relevant for the day. A bookshelf is situated less than 5 feet away from the computer desk and two of the four shelves are filled with DVD movies and one of the four shelves has a bunch of cd cases that I have accumulated through the years. My closet is a small but spacious parcel that holds my attire and useless rubbish from my last room.

When you walk into the room you will hear music, regardless of the time of day. I leave the music playing while I am gone to set the mood of the room for whoever visits while I am gone. My computer provides the musical entertainment in the far corner of the room thus creating a distant but definite 'feel' for the room. The room in its whole smells like that of an unsolicited capacity at times but the daily douse of febreze leaves a consistent citrusy smell that enlightens your senses on how to feel when in the room itself.

                Before I moved into it, this room was a neglected storage space. It was basically an in-home shed but without the cliché spiders and unwanted attendance of decay. When I was younger; whenever there was a family event, me and most of the extended family of my age would play hide and seek while the family visited. I always hid in this room if it was during the day because at night when the lights in the room were off it looked like that of a lifeless and gloomy den...With monsters!

 My house is that of a helping home; Extended family and friends are forever staying here only for a couple months at a time. At one point we didn't have enough space to hold everyone comfortably because more family was going to move in for a couple of months in addition to a few other family members already residing with us. Upon realization of how the living situations would be; my dad decided to convert the storage room into a fully functional bedroom. He finished within the 6 months that he had to work on it. It was a project for him to execute because he was newly retired and needed something to do with his time. By the end of 2006; the family that was occupying this room moved into their new home and this leaving this fresh opportunity to stretch my legs. My mother beat me to it! Turns out, she already had plans to turn the room into an area for her to take care of a few of her everyday chores that she can do without the essence of a new room. By September 2007; my parentals elected to move me into the room by my birthday.

                A simple day in this room consists of computing, eating, sleeping, being lazy and singing. I wake up every day and roll out of my bed without making it. I head to my closet and put on whatever is relevant for the occasion and I attend to whatever is on the agenda for the day.

When I return from wherever I was at; I instantly plop onto my uber comfortable love sac and just let my body rest until I get bored. From there I proceed to my computer desk where I check on what is going on in my world along with the real world, listen to my music, and talk to my friends. After I finish eating whatever I yearn for throughout the day, I procrastinate for the remaining hours of the night until my eyes start to burn and I slither back into my bed that feels the same way I left it 12+ hours ago where I  call it a night. Everyone has a place that they can be at peace if its anything from there room to a random location in their town, I am very grateful that my room provides everything that I need. It protects me from external harm, shelter from the public and most of all it provides plenty of entertainment for me and others that aren't fortunate enough to spend as much time in it as I do.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

-Untitled- Dramatic Monologue

i knew it....
why did i choose her?
she seemed like a beautiful pick at the time..
everything was right..
i seen love in the future..
what was i to her?
i cant believe that this has happened...somehow again..
i blame no one but god..
he ever so inevitably presented me with the same dilemma that has come about every time i like someone since freshman year..
wouldnt that somehow make it my fault for not going with the obvious?
'whats a crush ta do'
it-is fucked up to have to choose between 2 both of which are amazing candidates to be the next to recieve my full amout of love...
only to have it thrown back into my face simply for being me?
it Isnt fair..that I have such fate that occurs everytime it comes to my personal happYness.
here i am..heart shattered once again, for the simple fact that for some reason god doesnt feel i deserve to be Loved as much as i Loved..
im not one for whining..
but this life isnt worth living if i cant share my happYness with someone whom deserves it..i wake up and live everyday for the people of this world, and i work for what i want..but when it comes to happyness..

Tell me this isnt almost Beautiful..and i'll re-write it...



LOVE that song..Love the killers america
way to start with a BANG this week eah!?

so i realized something today that ive Known for a while..just not to the Fullest extent.. im a pretty good ass listener..even when its shit that doesnt concern me or something i could give 2 shits n a rats ass about..i put myself in there shoes and open my mind to there passion. they talk i listen, i input and they feel better at the end of the convo because they feel that they've just educated a youth on 'today'
haha i love rambling.

im gona go on.
i hate females son ;] hahaha
my Whackberry pearl is so cant really handle freezes up alot and gets all laggy n shit..and the battery dies after a little bit of extensive use..but for the avg business type/flashy hipster..the phone is..Suiting. hahaha
so i think i did a good deed this week..with proper possession..
it was a saturday..and i was covering a closing shift because the person had something better to do..and in the beginning of the shit i see my manager eli printing papers...i think i look up to eli. hes bomb and inspires me if i had inspiration... so anyways. im doin something irelevent like writing one of my useless subliminal quotes on the whiteboard in the back. and look at him and he looks at me with this shameful look on his like damn..frilz? hahaha and hes like Yuup..these are all our open boxed items in the store like Daamn! i didnt really know what alot was..but the whole 10-20 second convo we had papers were just printing out n shit. and i was like 'thats no good..' he says 'Nope..but im gona take care of it' im all 'Your the man for it!' those pointless words of encouragement that you blurt just to Maybe help and that was the end of the beginning part..
    an hour before close chris comes in and im all 'wtf man..get the hell out were closin n shit' just talkin my shit and hes like 'wheres eli?' and i say more shit that doesnt have anythign to do with..anything (im conscience of my talking in circles america) and hes like dude, hes givin me this laptop for 650 bro. im like ew...shit prolly sux..and hes like Nah man its the 64xx and im like Bullshit! and hes like nah foreals! and i go find the laptop and ring it up and shure nuff he dropped that shit to 649..i almost shit..not really but still.
sean cought wind of what was goin on and found himself one! fucker paid like 4 somethin for it. i was feelin HUNGRY! whew! i was buyin SOMETHIN. and im talkin my shit to jake and hes like bitch..ill sell this tv to you for 350! it was an hp plasma...i was like.........'the fuck outta here' and he was serious.......i thought about it..and i was like nah man hp..and plasma? eh............but for 350 i could suck it up..and sean S says 'well what about the samsung in the service room? same size..400' i lost my marbles..i went back n looked at was NIICE just..plasma...and plasma has its few-big disadvantages so i was iffy..but Suckin it up! for 400 fuck what anybody has to say about plasma..thats a 1600+ i put off on purchasing it until monday because i was an idiot and didnt get the check cashed in time and banks are closed on sundays.
so MONDAY COMES!!!!!! shits goin DOWN son! i take care of business...i go to the bank.
deposit the check.
withdraw enough for the phone
go to cingular..
woow. my bro's bestfriend mitched hooked me up so ill..
i actually felt loved. hahaha ill leave it at that..
so im swimmin on....-cloud 9- n shit and im drivin home playin with my new phone..
and i had to go home to change, then stop at the bank again take out 400 and go to work...........i get home change
and on the way to work........................................................................
idk what happened................
i called my mom
told her to call margie (my oldest bro's wife) and tell her she can buy it..............................................................................................................................................

and then she did!

owell...thats 400 more dollers for my savings........
they love it.
i have a 25$ gift card to jack n the box now.... :]
haha with 15 on it as of today... those ultimate cheeseburgers are NUTS yo..
took me 20 min to eat on this one night...

moving on..
my rough draft to my essay blew chunks..
i read it out loud in class on thursday and half way through i wanted to stop and get to Work. i know i can tell amazing stories... but those Happen..not made..
i mean i have a few blogs that make me feel confident about my 'writing abilities'
but when it comes to being assigned to write......
which is why im not interested in publications for a career..
im not interested in a career at all at the moment..but for a breif period of time it was totally publications..and marketing..and graphic design......and computer IT. but fck it yo. im gona do what i want at the moment.

i like living for now and and when...
i like it
when-when something comes up
so yeah...
what to go on about...

you'd like to know about the lovelife wouldnt you?

prolly not..
thanks. hahaa

so i never realized how happy target makes me..
wtf right? yeah man. i tried not to go tonight for the fact that they'd be closing in an hour..but smiths just didnt have what i was looking for and all the Mexicans were bugging FUCKING many kids..
you can take that how you want america. but the only white people i seen were cashiers. and the black ppl...were.....idk i seen a few..they were out of my way
i get to target with the intentions on just getting some candy... maaan
from 750 to 9...i had a cart with reeses pieces, skittles, gardettos, root beer, fruit snacks, gatorade and 5 string cheeses...thats all under 10 bucks thank you.
i had all that shit picked out in 10 min....
and then wtf did i do for the next hour??? hahaha
one things for sure some lady in there has something against me because i was pushing my cart and you know..running and then jumping on the thing and gliding..because its awesome.
and shes all 'uh, can you Please not do that sir, its not safe' BUT she said in that tone america. dont call me prissy. that tone made me feel 10....hahahaah so i turned the corner and did it again.
she comes around the corner and says 'turning the corner doesnt make it ok!' i yelled  'im not putting anyone in danger!' and walked til the next corner...
end. hahaaa
so bored of readin my shit yet?
i know you are..
but you continue anyways huh..? maybe im just being confident..
maybe you stopped half way through my tv story..haha
owell though..
this is me writing and you reading for what point?
so you can hear about someone elses life instead of yours or your bffe that sweats the small things........ im prolly wrong but hey thats how im writing it. hahaha
my buddy mike told me today that he respects me..

jake was UBER late opening the registers and so i had to hustle to open them before open. and i get a 1/4 of the registers open by like 945 (store opens at 10) and wayne comes up to me and informs that me that he went ahead and opened 1/4 of the registers for me. assuring me that he had my back :)
wayne: wingman 1
Mike..the man is full of old school insight that keeps me interested because i LOVE to hear about shit from a few generations ago...i hate my generation.
not my people..just..this time...shits so corrupted...
so mike tells me where he stands with the 'n word' and how he used to drive a bus (one of his PLENTY occupations) and hearing black kids n white kids under the age of evin 16 call each other that word so freely..
i let him know how i felt about that..'that word is slang now mike, its not evin watered down, its just water. the only (blk) people that take offense to the word that are under a certain age are only taking offense out of ignorance. not all but a good number. theres no way that word can effect anyone the way it did 10+ years ago when people use it in the Smallest of situations' and he said his input and what not and then tells me im a good kid, and that he respects me and has my back and to Tell him if im ever bothered by him..
mike= wingman 2
both are 'old fogies' but still amazing..

work is going..for me. haha going good but damn..shits kinda a hassle..ive actually settled for 60 hours on this check....wth? but damn. i refuse to stress that shit. haha do you know who i am? can you Link the word stress to Danny Ray?
no. haha because i dont give enough of a fuck...

enough about work...

ive been paying peoples bills around the fam this month...wth? i Love helping..but damn when it comes to money america..that Is the future to me..
i see so many people at high age and struggling..i reFUSE to let that happen to me.
i'd rather struggle now and let that shit smoothen out..haha my taste is too expensive to 'want'..
but slowly but surely getting reimbursement..heh im not gona hustle my own peeps! i know they'd help me if i needed fam is elite! haahah 'TRIPP'
hahaha jp..were just as good as the next fam..
thats gona be the 1st tattoo i get..
wana know why?
i think its 'poetic' just not to that extent..hahha
so my adoption isnt a FULL adoption..its adoption/gaurdianship. so my last name doesnt change, and i know my whole fam n all that shit.
through the was always a debate to changing my last name to tripp.......
i feel so bad but..i dont want to..i like Ray...i just to. thats me. and theres already TWO Danny Tripps in the family....
so im not changing my name to tripp........i dont want to..if i ever change'll be Ray..i wont have a middle name but thats ok...selfish..i know.....but i'd also like to start a fam with that last name....kinda my own own 'franchise'...starts with of the tree......
but anyways
whenever the time gona get Tripp tattooed on my body...that way 'ill always be a tripp'
it'll have PLENTY of meaning to me..and im Sure my fam will like it..if not...
fuck it they will...hahaa
this is a long blog...
im finna take a break on that ass because james just called me.
he needs a ride from tbell and i'll have a chicken case-a-dilla waiting for me..haha FOR FREE!


so this casedilla isnt half bad..
the baja blast is ILL.haha so on the way home. -a friend from high school- drunk dialed me...hahha i love it when people do that..haha i normally record it and then call then the next day let them listen...or i myspace it to them...either way..its great..
pretty much the only 'positive' accomplishment of drinking.. i mean yeah drinkings bad blah blah blah..but ive been drunk once

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Def. one of the Funnest nights of my life..

..and i drunk dialed someone..and i got SO much off my was beautiful...i mean...not much was accomplished BUT when i woke up the next day...i remembered what i'd said..and the next time i seen that person..things were the same.......hahahahah BUT what was discussed was discussed and we knew where we stood..........

so yeah... i just previewd what i had for this blog.....
thats a good 10..20 min of reading..unless you speed read thru my shit looknig for answers...

im sorry...there isnt much enlightenment in this long drawn out blog..but i just had the urge to -outlet- with no certain intention...

thank you for reading..
sorry for the waste of time (if you made it this far)
i appreciate you :]
and you have a good -life- until next time.....

im so not done writing..its actually a shame that i can write all this..but when time comes to write an essay..i barely get by with little satisfaction..i accept that..haha your cool.

do me a favor....

:Smile like ya mean it:
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Sunday, September 16, 2007

so im about 20 away

from 5000 total..
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and i know that this one will push me over thr 5k limit..thats taken me bout 3 yrs to reach..haha

so hello my fellow americans..
things have gone Up since the last blog..
yeh...haha that one recieved alot of attn that i knew it would..
idk if anyone understands how much attn that one got. but i will say this
thank you All for caring. i know you do, cuz you know i care about you.
thanks for all the concerned/check up phone calls and txt's! haha
i appreciate you..

im fine. i promise, i was fine then too just not Normal..haha and its ok to show a little weakness right? haha i am right. just not from me. haha i stay strong and keep my head up for a reason..and thats Obviously because it sets an example for folks..everyone from lil children to older adults..they see that Me of all ppl, is one that doesnt let 'Life' get to him. and thats damn amazing for someone at the age of 19..sorry for giving myself cred but fck it. haha i see ppl crumble to some of the same 'problems' that i have..
life goes on!
"everyday above ground, is a good day" i heard that from an asshole one day at work. haha (story) yeah man fuckin..some guy was bein a Total dick! about one of our coups and told me i didnt know shit and damn near called me illiterate..i didnt mind it..words dont hurt me! but what do i do? ill fck with you head if i can..
he didnt break. haha he was goin on while waiting for some shit and i was like must suck huh?  and goin on..bein all calm...showing resistance and then Blam! he throws that quote at me..and at the time i was like 0o0 thats beautiful blah blah blah..but you dont look like your having a beautiful day and then he got all intellectual.. anyways

so kanyes cd is so awesome..but now im rappin bout money hoes and rims agaain..haha that was from college drop out! and shit this graduation one...he shows progression..

tmoros gona be a big day...
i actually wrote it out..haha

-Wake up
~bank opens at 9
-cash fin aid check
-make sure everythings iight
-take out 3 and head to cingular (on fuckin..rainbow n spring mtn. Daaamn! haha)
-grab my whackberry! if its 200 plus rebate n what not
~Hopefully be done by noon
~~if home b4 noon.. go home  sleep, charge the battery for 6-8 hrs
-then to work 1-7 shift
-somewhere in there do the deal with the tv [42'' plasma, 400] DAMN!
-take my broke ass home
-HOPEFULLY DO MY HW!!!!!! and play with my fone..

thats the Perfect day
but shit does happen today with my check

i had an awesome day with laura :]

so moving on...
this blog has gone dry..its not as interesting as the one 2-3 entries ago was..

so yeah..
off to my pen n pad

that pic actually turned out to be pretty useful.haha

speaking of!
i need to print HELLA pics room could be so much more...meaningful?? just kididn. whe'll see
thanks for sure ill be well over 5100 by nxt entry...haha maybe evin 5050..haha kk
later days my fellow america..

on with your original broadcasted lives