Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Essay 4

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In the events of great catastrophe, we rely on what is real as oppose to fantasy. Marvel superheroes play an important role in our everyday life but when real tragedy strikes, the fact remains that they are still only comic book. I am writing about a picture that was published on page 6 of the marvel "Heroes" book that is a 65 page book filled with illustrations from all of the artists of several marvel comics, dedicating art in homage to the events of September 11, 2001. By the end of this essay I hope that the reader will be able to glance at this illustration and hopefully feel the same way that I did when I paid attention to the details of the picture that gives it the feel and emotion that it gave me.

In the scene, there is a boy and a girl centered in a small room with yellowish walls staring through their window at the catastrophic events of 9/11 and a spotlight that shines light on most of the room. The left side of the room consists of marvel comic books, posters, and action figures all thrown together in an unimportant order that still gets the message across. There is a poster of spider-man in his most famous pose of him swinging from his web, under that is the classic poster of Captain America in his fighting stance, while the hulk and wolverine lay upside down against the pillow. On the edge of the bed is a Black Panther comic book that is half open and laying half way off of the bed. There are two more action figures and both of them are practically under the bed, the two action figures are the daredevil and Mr. Fantastic from the fantastic 4.  As you pan to the right a little bit there are 3 toy vehicles on the floor, those of which our modern day heroes use to save lives, these vehicles are a police car, ambulance, and a fire truck. The boy and the girl are dressed up in their best efforts to represent our modern day, real life heroes. The boy is wearing a red shirt with the word "fire" scrawled on the top of it, a fire hat and rubber boots, while the girl has a blue jacket with the word "police" is taped to the upper shoulder blade and a police hat. Through the window, the children gape at the dastard events and commotion of September 11. As they gaze you cannot help but notice the way that they are clutching multiple dolls of a variety of ethnicities.

When I look at the picture I feel the desire to play along with the children so that they know that they are not alone. The way the two children are positioned show a visual feeling of despair and helplessness that the kids are feeling. It is obvious that they are doing everything that they can in their power to help, but at that age all they can do is watch. The two of them have the best intentions and obviously understand the meaning of unity and courage by the way that they are clutching the many dolls of several different race and ethnicities, along with the American flag. The children are obviously bright enough to know the difference between fantasies and real world by the way they choose to be a police woman and fireman over the likes of a super hero like super-man or wonder-woman, while also understanding how important it is to keep everyone together from every ethnicity

The way that the fantasy heroes are obviously, carelessly placed as oppose to the main focus of the picture which is of the two children dressed up as the "real" heroes of today. It illustrates that as much as we look up to those "fantasy" heroes saving people's lives every day, is still just a fantasy and all takes place in a fictional world. But when it comes to real life tragedy taking place such as the events of 9/11, we must rely on our actual heroes to help and do what they can as regular average humans, and let the comic book heroes sit aside.  With a picture like this it somewhat takes value from our comic book heroes that we ever so look up to and makes them seem much smaller than they already are. It is both positive and negative because it is always good for a child to look up to a superhero as a role model to do the right thing or be a little bit heroic, but at the same time elaborates to children in general that those fantasy heroes can't really do anything but inspire those that have a good imagination.

Personally I think that this picture relays one of the strongest messages out of the rest of the 52 illustrations in the book. Although every one of the pictures give great meaning, and show strength, unity, love, great tragedy. I feel that this picture speaks for itself to any and every type of person, and to me, for a picture with such a message to be able to be understood by anyone from the simple age of 5 to 95, African American to Russian just makes the picture all that much more to write about.




prolly my worst one yet..ha but damn..i just dont care..

its been a month++ since my last blog..haha but SO FUCKIN MUCH has gone on since..i just havent had the time to sit down and tell all...well.
im not even gona tell all. but. alot went down man.
ive changed a bit sinec the beginning of nov..
and also..haha the end of this year is going by SO FUCKIN fast!!!!! im not down....

ill post for the people soon. thanks for tuning in america.. feel free to comment i guess

December 11, 2007

and im wondering whom my unknown readers are..i post a new blog and gain like 20 views in the 1st like..20 min..i know its none of my -friends- haha cuz theyre sleep...i appreciate it. haha

anyways....
i crawled back outa bed because i know that you folks really need an update..
and i have aLOT on my mind..
i just dont know what or how to get it out..fck
its 4:19 am and i have an essay due in less than 5 hours. i was laying down to sleep for a good 4.9 of those hours..haha im bad..
but i do what i do..i am conscience of what i do whether it good or bad..

but what am i doing now? what am i doing..i hate being in that position..
i have learned about myself that im a fan of things going right the 1st time around..
i have learned that my interest is hard to keep in EVERY aspect of life..
it sucks..but it is life
and its what i live.
i love to live.

living is so easy for me Life isnt easy for me..but living day to day. doing whatever comes up. its easy..its that 'laidback' shit. and i prefer it.
i prefer being a civilian living everyday life with the dayjob that pays just enough to live.. its crazy how people front that its soo ok, but deep down are scared to live a life without drive..without a dream..without..a plan.
(thats a bold statement dan) i dont care..i have given folks the benefit of the doubt when i tell them that i dont know what i want to be in life and that i gave up trying for the simple fact that i dont care!
ppl will prolly read that and think i dont care what i turn out to be?
fck off with that. i can guarantee you that i wont be a begger..
beggers and the homeless inspire me..i dont even care how it sounds. the shits true. they inspire me to keep on keeping on with my dayjob. i dont have a dream to pursue. so i pursue whatevers on top of my list at the moment. i dont have ambitions to be a VERY RICH AND WEALTHY person. i dont. i dont care. im if that makes me a low life? then so be it. it may let you down but it sure as shit isnt letting me down because i know for sure that i know how to save for a rainy day..although there are MANY MANY MANY fckn obsticles..
i still manage to have something put away..
fuck the system..its trash

and to hell with law enforcement..fuck them they do a good job at serving and protecting
im not bitter though. im just gona pay my fine that i dont deserve and live life.

im going to pay for my 2 classes (YES 2 classes, get over it) that im not really eager to start.

i Will pay off my credit card (300 doller balance) and then raise the limit (from 500 to 700) (yes, i do have the means of doing all of that, without the help of my parents. NO, im not flossin, nor will i ever be..maybe) and then purchase the camera that i want.

its whats at the top of my list at the moment.
so hmmm..because im paying $700 for a camera and 2 lenses, prolly means that i want to be a photographer when i grow up?
nah..i just like taking cool ass pictures with the occasional conceptual picture.
dont i have better things to blow my money on?
yeah i do.
im sure theres a few things you could think of. but guess what?
ha. im not gona say it for the sake of sounding like an asshole.
haha
ive become a bit of an asshole over the last 2 months and whelp. i am aware. but hey, the nice guy gets a little fed up with being taken for granted.
dont worry though my fellow americans. im still VERY nice, until i have a reason not to be.

its the holiday seasons and im working retail. awesome huh?
i'd say..
i worked 13+ hours this week and i am over it.
maybe i deserved that amount, who knows.

hmm...so what else has gone on in the last 2 months that doesnt involve job and love life?
NOT MUCH! haha but to hell with going into the love life. that shit...
wow.
too much..and im very greatful for everything..i havent had this much excitement and ~drama in....my life! im not exactly ~enjoying~ it all but hey! we all gotta go thru it man. just another chronicle to try to teach your kids so they dont go thru the same shit..but no. haha that shts inevitable america. just embrace it! drama aint nothin but a matter of feelings and words. the end. haha
(was that subtle enough?)

so the semester is coming to an end and so nears my Drive to pursue a degree..
folks dont even know man..
throughout high school (4 years) plus jr high..i Never planned on going to college..
if it were up to me! i wouldve attended either of my zoned schools and just been as socially successful as i am coming outta votech. educationally though? eh.
for me...i know what i know and acquire more knowledge as i go..but if im not interested? then my attention is somewhere else..back to the point..
i am attending school because my mother would like to see me at least obtain a degree of some sort even if it was just the basic associates..and then with the pretty nice help provided by financial aid..
why not? i mean..mom and pop are 'proud', and the others see it as a young african american man making something of his life (no im not getting racial, just be real and understand that thats what runs through the minds of older folks from an era that doesnt consist of that) thats how i feel when they give the approving nodd and then ask what my major is, before suggesting something that actually makes money.

i like being a bit more blunter..i see some 'edge' in this writing..i dont like it though. haha i feel that the people wont like what there reading? hey! its whats goins on right now. read past blogs and notice the change..its life..

life is going on. i have school tomorrow and then after that? idk. maybe hang with somebody and then return to my bed at the end of the night. i like it.

i am currently satisfied with life, with things as...outta whack as they are..i am learning from everything, thats the Best you can do..
to hell with dwelling man. that isnt me.

"never looking back, or too far in front of me, the present is a gift and i just want to BE"

who's up for some inspiration. hahaha srsly though...im thinking about printing that out in 3 diff parts and then putting the 'never looking back' part above my door that leads to the house, and then the 'or too far in front of me' in front of my door that leads outside. and then 'the present is a gift' above my computer desk, OR my bed
EH? EH? yeh..its all good.

so i purchased some wayfarers:
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from ebay for like 10 bucks with shipping and im pretty sure that theyre the business right now..hahaha

and thenn! my threadless collection has grown to 9 shirts now. im pretty excited! im finally not forced to rock the inevitable hollister..not that i have a probby with it..that word 'hollister' just makes it easy for people to label me. haha which ALSO isnt a problem for me..im interested in what people can come up with for a label for me. i stay random for a reason!
haha "it keeps the tricks guessin"
haha yeeaaah buddy!.

so i have SOOOOOOOOOOO much more to write..but i dont feel like it..haha simple as that my nigs....

hey.
thank you for reading.
im sorry for taking so long to update..
i appreciate you! and im sure we'll be in touch!
iloveyouall
talk to you soon


piece outros

Monday, October 29, 2007

what is october 2007?

the month of october has been.........what-the-fuck
not evin in a bad way...
just wow man..
everything from friends to fam to work to school to emotions to ~company~
im so fcked..
ughs..maybe im better off alone...YEAH RIGHT!
anyways
lets take a minute to watch lupes 'dumb it down' video







his styles pretty cool..
and its pretty Bomb how he can talk with his hands..
haha w0op

moving on

im actually gona go thru with this tv america

i Gotta get somethin from eli's magic before hes gone...
that mans like the black father i never had. hahaa i told my moms today..i look up to the man though..its pretty cool..
so yeah my room's gona be THAT much better! haha Rad.

im mad tired man.. but this song by lupe is somethin else..and im talkin to my april..shes fly.

the day is now monday the 29th..3:05 am, and my ticket is due by today or else im a felon...haha the check was mailed yestaday so its whatev thank god for postmark n shit
wow..i havent blogged in a few

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that there is where i am at on the wall of photography..i like the thought of it...just all the pictures that i feel deserve to be on the wall is gona go on. fck organization and fck making sense. you'll like it if your not shallow..haha you'll like alot of things about me if your not shallow..i dont know alot of shallow people..but then at the same time i know enough to fill that quota. haha owell though.."to each his own"

i want more money..and it sucks the associate reviews at work are goin on and ive only been there since june and you have to be there a minimum of 6 months..
theres no 60/90 day probation period deal..theres no benefits til l8r on..that place Sux..but the people are awesome. haha its so funny that a maJority of the people there say the same..'i hate this place but..its fun' little do some of them know that most of the rest of the store feels the same way. haha shits like a fam..we keep eachother goin everyday..its cool to be a part of..also good to provide some comic relief..just further inspiration to take up professional comedy of any type..blah
im sick of school..haha 1 class right? fck it wanker. im tired of that one class.its not hard or anything..its just inconveinent. i Hella dont have the drive for school.i hella realized the other day that damn..ALL through high school, and even after. i Didnt plan on going to college..it wasnt that i didnt want to..i just..didnt care.i wanted to graduate and live..and im doing it!
with the addition of school.
and one class..is SO fine with me. to hell with anyone whom looks down upon it. im not gona front and break myself for the satisfaction of..You?
(you isnt referring to anyone in spacific..just the public)

owell..ash is in town..its so cool to see her now that she doesnt live here. haha
i wana go to cali alot..but ccity is sucha cockblock on everything in life. hahaha but fck it..i can always take the time off..if i were more of a planner.haha i totally dig on the spur of the moment dig..tonight woulda been a good night to do it..im off tomoro and tuesday damnit.but i would really like to have a gps deal goin..calis confusin as shit. haha

wow..its 3:23 and im still typin away..it doesnt feel as good though..writing feels so good now..its amazing i really dont know how..so much comes out thats randomly awesome.. the word 'beautiful disaster' comes to mind when i look at my writing.. it has so much writing with such little meaning..but some of the meanings behind them are just shy of amazing..haha
maybe i should write..maybe i should do stand up..maybe i should..
Live..haha fck it.i wana see ny

brooklyn more than other parts..but my time will come.

yehp..still typing n shit. haha
SO tired man.........

so ive been debating lately..kinda wishin i could go back to september where i made one helluva decision..im kinda wishin i could see how turned out had i chosen the path opposite of the one i took..but oh well right?
fck it all just type
and buy 32 inch tv's for 400 dollers. haha
owell..
gnight my fellow americans..

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^ one of those "greatest nights of my life" dealio's




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Bleh..im happy :/


Thursday, October 25, 2007

Essay 2

so its pretty trashy...i read it..im uninterested. haha

but fck..its too late for revision and all that. its 4:50 am.

class is at 9..which is when its due haha.

i love it..college baby.i only have 1 class too!

anyways

here ya go my fellow americans..haha

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Significance of the Adoption Process..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />


Adoption isn't as easy as just applying for a child and receiving them in 10 to 20 business days; there is a little bit more to it than that. There are many steps to the adoption process that include the procedure of applying to become an adoptive parent, and the issues/controversy surrounding adoption. Although there are many other steps in the adoption process, those are some of the points that I feel people should know a little bit more about than what is already known acquired through common knowledge.


The adoption process consists of choosing the type of adoption which can be done either publically or privately. When done publically, you have to go through an agency that is funded by the state or a 3rd party organization. If the adoptive parents choose to adopt publically then most parents will receive assistance in the process from the state's Department of Social Services, or the Department of Family and Children Services, included in the assistance are training and education on what to do and the outcome of the situations that can and will occur. As oppose to a private adoption which doesn't involve an agency. A private adoption is done through an attorney or a facilitator where they have to hire a lawyer for themselves. In this process the adoptive parents have more control on the outcome of the adoption process and the decision on whether the birth mother can or cannot be in touch with them.  Next is deciding whether they want an open, closed or semi open adoption. If the parents choose an open adoption then the birth parents have the option of meeting the adoptive parents before they choose to place their child with them. If the birth parents are comfortable with the family then the relationship may grow even after the adoption is finalized. The relationship can grow more personal and include visits, phone calls, exchanging letters, pictures and or e-mails. The adopted child can meet his/her birth family and communication is as open as the parties involved decide together. At the age of 18 the adopted child has complete access to their original records.


If the adoptive parents chose to have a closed adoption then the record of the biological parents are kept completely secret.  The adoption of an older child whom already knows their biological parents cannot be made closed. This used to be the more popular/traditional type of adoption before the use of internet and other means of tracking a person down. The semi open adoption is basically the agency letting the parent see the progress of their child without any contact.  After the process of deciding on how the parents want to go about adopting comes the more personal phase of the long adoption process.


After all of the fuss of being setup to adopt a child, the next step in the process is to complete a home study. The home study is a report for the courts and the adoption professionals to determine whether the parents could provide a stable environment for an adopted child. The elements that are included in a majority of home studies include the following:


·         An Autobiography: Consists of a brief overview of the parent's childhood experiences, family relationships, their marriage, employment status and personal interests?


·         A Personal Interview: The social worker will have a one on interview with each parent alone, and then one with the both of them together. From the interviews the social worker determines if a stable living environment can be provided for the child.


·         Background Checks: They check each parent's criminal record and or any claims of child abuse.


·         Health Status: The status check of each parents health from a physical examination performed by their routine practitioner to determine if they have a regular life expectancy.


·         Financial Statements: The social worker reviews their annual income, savings, liabilities or debts, and overall net worth


Those are the 5 steps of the home study portion of the adoption process that occur most. Some steps are added or subtracted from the procedure depending on the state, agency or the social worker.  If approved then the parents have to wait for a placement.


        After the long process of finding an agency or attorney, and then completing the home study, comes possibly the most difficult component in the adoption process, which is waiting for a placement. The time that is spent waiting on placement depends on many different factors of the type of child their adopting varying from the race, age, to mental and physical health. Adopting a child of a different race greatly reduces the waiting time of being placed.


Once everything in the extensive process of becoming an adoptive parent, and receiving a new child into the family is complete, the adoption is finalized and official after the parents receive full legal rights and responsibilities of the child. Full parental guardianship is acquired after the biological parent's rights have been terminated, the child has lived in the home for a minimum of 6 months, and the social worker has submitted a recommendation of approval, a judge will finalize it all by rewarding the adoptive parents with full guardianship.


Things may seem great after everything is finished but the problems can only start to occur once the child gets older and develops a mind of their own or is easily influenced by the wrong crowd. Being an adopted person myself, I completely understand how easy it is to have question or concern about how and why I am where I am now.  Most of the more popular issues that most people are familiar with when they think of problems with adoption are what they see and hear in schools, and in the media, in some situations teachers' lesson plans have to be slightly altered because they include activities that involve the child drawing their family tree and or even tracing their eye color back through their parents and grandparents to see whom they inherited them from.  When it comes to the media it is an ongoing dispute on how adoption is represented as unfair. Or in most cases in television or film, the adoptee spending a majority of the program searching for their biological parents; in both cases the feelings and thoughts of the adoptee are dumbed down and one participant group is favored, ignoring the two other participants in the adoption process, thus leading to younger kids to teenagers having the wrong perception of the way adoption really is.


Another instance of an issue in adoption is the term "adoptism", which means to have the conviction that goes against adoption like the belief that adoption is not a legitimate way to build a family, and the belief that adoptees are defined throughout their lives by the fact of their adoption, and the assumption that the individual's abilities come from their family's abilities, and the attitude that all abilities are "inherited" rather than learned.    


One of the more serious issues with adoption is the disruption of an adoption. Disruption is what most people call the ending of an adoption before it is legally completed thus potentially being able to cause the child to suffer from reactive attachment disorder, and the parents suffering from social stigma. All in all it is a completely negative situation but the fact that the parents were approved for adoption after all of the tests and studies that were run does not mean that the adoption will go completely as planned.


So when it comes down to it, those are just a few factors to consider while still thinking about adopting a child and providing them with a different life than what is considered "normal"  in today's society.


 :D 1296/1250..success baby


               


so this evanescence cd is so amazing..why didnt i ever buy it!!

Thursday, October 4, 2007

who’s up for some excitement?

you wont find it here!
here i am in this space...to type...
and im blank.
the car ride home tonight i gave myself a headache, thinkin about everything.....
fuck it all-
i bought a pen and a little memo book..the small cutsie ones that ppl carry around to jot shit...
well im gona become a Master Jotter..hahaha nah
but i Do have 80 pages to write what i want..
because i think im gona make it a private one...
yi know..where it says "private stay out" on the cover n shit..haha that girly shit from the movies..i dont care.sometimes i think of some 'poetic' shit..that some ppl just dont read with the right mind..

im listenin to twistas 1st..."Adrenaline Rush"
shit takes me back to 11th grade..haha what a year.

fuck i still have a headache..
caused by me..
haha so is that self inflicted pain?
haha right..

yeh...
so yeh...so im pretty bummed that life is not conveinent right now..
and in the midst of all this "bullshit" <--(the only word i can think of to call whats goin on in my 'life')
i find myself wanting to speak to my biological mother....i only call her that publically..
i call her mom when i refer to her..shes actually a quite amazing person at times too..
shes 24-7 bullshit..i dont evin know the last time something good happened for her?
but damn..shes still alive man..she still calls me when she gets the chance..i guess shes over takin care of my sisters n shit at the moment..she dont have a job i dont think? but i understand..keep them from killin eachother..haha both bein 30+..
she lives though..day to day..ive got my problems yes..i cant just shake everything off in my life because theres always someone going through worse..fuck that. i am something diff..but nothing amazing..i am only human.
im tired of explaining stuff anymore..i wrote something today in my new trusty handy dandy notepad..
"the lack of _________ship in my life is driving me to a fucked stage..how do i know?
cuz ppl are starting to notice..
i dont talk about my problems america.
the shits just unnecessary. so of course i shake it off..
i have told 2 or 3 ppl my problems..
i got 0 help..
not that i was looking for help man..
i take care of that myself..i was just sharing to......test i guess..
actually a co-worker of mine is pretty good with "advice"
i like having him around for that..
haha cuz when i tell ppl my problems..i normally tell them the solution and then inform that i was just sharing because i felt it was necessary......(i know im talking in circles..fuck it) but yeah..

this phrase has occured alot lately "why are you such a know-it-all?"
im not..i promise!
i just think before i say..thats all..evin when it doesnt seem like it...i do




wow....i still have this headache..
and theres still so much on the mindwave..but im just not going to share..

thus making this a pointless blog...
one day ill have a good one! haha i promise...things cant stay bland forever..


i think im being played with?
owell though..sometimes its fun to analyze